firstname.lastname@example.org February 8, 2012
In a letter to: Bob Beckel Fox News The Five at Five
Regarding the formation of the NURU - National Unemployment Recipients' Union
Here is a sure fire way to get your disingenuous Barack Osama Bin Obama re-elected� just lower the unemployment rate further as we near November. Fear not as I have devised a sure-fire way to pull it off.
You democrats have already stopped counting those not seeking unemployment benefits.. This alone lowers the reported number� good so far? And the number jugglers can stop counting first time claims from those who have recently graduated from college.. well, that'll surely push the number lower. But to really make this work� hang on� because here's the real beauty of the idea, and you are going to love this because its right up your union-lovin' alley; simply form a public employee union and call it the NURU or National Unemployment Recipients Union.
With this union, you can eliminate damn near everyone left currently being counted in the unemployment number and report close to full employment by November. Bob, it's so simple, even you will understand it.
In a nutshell, anyone who is actively looking for work and is currently receiving unemployment benefit checks qualifies for membership, in fact; make membership mandatory for anyone who receives an unemployment benefit check. You democrats are good at making things mandatory.
And while you are at it, withhold 5% from each check to fund the salaries of the union bosses (can I be one please). And here is the real great part: Since all those recipients are 1; actively working hard to find a job and 2; are being paid while they are seeking work, technically, they are working for their unemployment checks and as such can technically be classified as public employees. If they are walking rather than using fuel-driven transportation, you can call them "green jobs". What's work anyway but simply the exchange of money (unemployment benefits) paid by someone (the government) for the use of that person's time in the performance of a task (looking for a job). The union can continue to lobby for extension of the unemployment benefit and thus justify the mandatory dues the unemployed must pay, since it is in their best interest that they continue to operate in this fashion. Now you and the rest of the democrats can claim nearly zero unemployment come November and win re-election because your policies of tax and spend more to create less will have been a success.
Keynesian Morons, all of you.
Yours truly, Peter Babag, California USA